Facebook Status Shayari 2013

Dil ki Dairy me save karli hum ne unki file
ab Mita nahi sakta usey koi virus ya missile
Dunya hasseen lagti hai jab bhi wo karte hai smile
yaad me ab.. dekhte hai har roz unki Facebook Profile.

LOL Facebook Status Updates

Laugh out Loud Facebook Statuses

• Want the truth? Just ask a kid.


• The first rule of breakfast club is don’t you forget about me.


• So your baby doesn’t know any tricks at all?


• My keyboard needs a removable crumb tray like the toaster.


• I’m mad, but not as mad as someone asking to see the rules in the middle of a monopoly game.


• When your girlfriend or wife says “lol have fun”, do not have fun. Abort mission. I repeat. Abort mission.


• I win every argument… in my head… later that day… in the shower.


• I am hungry 25 hours a day.


• That awkward moment when you miss one step on the stairs and you think you are about to die!


• The longest five seconds in anyone’s life is waiting to press the “Skip Ad” button on YouTube.


• I don’t have bumper stickers because I don’t believe in anything strongly enough to potentially get my car keyed.


• Honking your horn is fun but rolling down your window and screaming “honk” at people is just way more satisfying.


• Sometimes I think my job is actually a hidden-camera game show where they see how much absurd bullshit I’ll put up with before I catch on.


• The only way I want to see your ultrasound picture is if you’re having a velociraptor.


• We get it people on Facebook. You’re married, you have kids, you’re happy. Calm down.


• Imagine being 100% naked and hearing a bunch of loud noises you don’t understand, that’s what it’s like to be an animal.


• If you ever want to hate yourself, click the 2008 button on your Facebook timeline and read what you posted.


• I just made 3 critical errors: 1. I woke up for work. 2. I went to work. 3. I arrived at work.


• I don’t care who you are, if a kid wants to show you something they’re proud of you better act impressed.


• Don’t judge someone because they sin differently than you. 

Tags:LOL Facebook Status Updates

 

Laugh Worthy Facebook Status Updates

>

• After filling up my gas tank this morning before work, I realized that I didn’t want to eat for the rest of the week anyways.


• Remember: Life isn’t about having amazing experiences, it’s about making mediocre experiences look awesome on Facebook.


• I’m so old, I can remember going through a whole day without taking a picture of anything.


• That awkward moment when your kindness is mistaken with flirting.


• Unless your kid’s fundraiser is selling booze, I want no part of it.


• It sounds fun, Autocorrect, but I am enjoying beers with Jess, not Jesus.


• I like most people as long as they’re not behind a steering wheel or a keyboard.


• Every time I eat Chinese I feel like I weigh won ton.


• Hashtags make your posts completely invisible to me.


• If you had to choose between a billion dollars or world peace, how many bedrooms would your mansion have?


• Inspirational status: Today’s probably going to suck. Don’t be a little bitch and handle that shit.


• Why do people who insult themselves get mad when you agree with them?


• Driving would be much more entertaining if there were no yellow lights.


• Starting tomorrow: Whatever Life throws at me… I’m gonna duck so it hits someone else


• Hey you guys making fun of the people you see in Walmart…you were in Walmart too.


• My earthquake kit is just a tuxedo because in case of a disaster, I want to look like the most important person to save.


• Women don’t go crazy, they are crazy. They just “go normal” from time to time.


• I’d be a great cat because I hate everyone but insist everyone loves me.


• ASKHOLE: A person who constantly ask for your advice, yet always does the opposite of what you told them


• Girls who say “a lot of guys are after me” should keep in mind that low price always attract many customers

Tags: Laugh Worthy Facebook Status Updates

 

Top 50 Status-Awesome-Responsive-Facebook Status Updates

type='html'>

• That awkward moment when you don’t understand a joke but laugh anyway, and then someone asks you to explain the joke.
• 70% of our planet is covered in water, the other 30% is covered in idiots
• Designated Driver is just a nicer way of saying, you can come with us, but nobody wants to deal with your drunk ass.
• Your mom’s so easy her nickname is ‘Staples’.
• This lady in Walgreens is staring at me like she’s never seen anyone put on deodorant and then put it back on the shelf.
• If you say A for effort I’m going to correct you and say E for effort.
• Doing something weird and thinking “this is why I’m single..”
• “Beauty sleep” is such bologna I sleep 12 hours a day and I still look like a trashcan.
• McDonald’s Management Rule #23: “The employee with the most severe accent or speech impediment must work the drive-thru at all times.”
• Preheating an oven requires too much commitment.
• I need new swear words.
• I like my women how I like my coffee, with little or no pubic hair.
• Just sprayed a fly with Axe body spray. He’ll live, but he won’t get laid.
• Me: We could see snakes on a plane if you want.
  Friend: oh cool whats it about? Me: Elephants…..elephants on a boat.
• I bought a used UPS truck. It gets bad gas mileage but I can park anywhere.
• Don’t worry, Prince Harry. We only have one bathroom, so I too know what it’s like to be 3rd in line for the throne.
• It’s interesting how the ads on Youtube never have trouble buffering.
• If Candy Crush had a face, I’d punch it.
• Said Hi to my crush on chat. She didn’t reply. Awesome!  I left her speechless.
• Don’t sweat the small stuff. Don’t sweat the medium or large stuff either. Stop perspiring on everything. Take your sweaty ass elsewhere.
• That awkward moment when you fail at being mad at somebody because they make you laugh.
• People are generally unhappy until they get what they want, then the cycle starts all over again.
• You must expect great things of yourself before you can do them.
• I’ve forgotten what it’s like to have a normal sleeping pattern.
• Even staring at a wall becomes interesting while studying.
• I hate it when I meow at cats and they don’t meow back. Unbelievably rude.
• Any woman can drive you crazy when you’re with her. Find the woman who drives you crazy being without her.
• My tombstone will read I should have googled it first.
• Are we posting pictures of missing vegans on soy milk cartons yet?
• I’m convinced girls only want one thing from guys… All of our hoodies.
• Dentist: Do you remember the last time you flossed? Me: It should say on your sheet right over there.
• Girls become instant best friends when they find out they hate the same people.
• Nothing makes me want to leave a website more than a pop-up window saying, “Are you sure you want to leave this page?”
• At the end of my dinner the waiter asks “wanna box” so I got up and knocked him the f out. I bet he won’t ask that question again.
• Depresso: When you’ve run out of coffee.
• Dear auto correct, please stop changing my rude words into nice ones. You piece of shut.
• You can run from your problems. Unless your problem is a cheetah.
• You find out who your real friends are when all you have left to offer is friendship.
• These spaghetti-o’s taste like I don’t get paid until tomorrow.
• Wonder what Facebook employees do to waste time at work?
• Remember when there was nothing to check and no device to check it on and all you did was live your life?
• So glad my face doesn’t have a progress bar that shows how much I’m understanding what other people are saying.
• I don’t think of it as eating grapes, I think of it as preventing future raisins. Some call me a hero.
• I wish hangovers and orgasms could swap durations.
• New rule: unless you punched a shark in the face to dislodge that tooth, you’re not allowed to wear it on a necklace.
• I’m all for change as long as it doesn’t directly affect my routine.
• It’s a good thing not everyone has a smartphone. Someone has to honk when the light turns green.
• I keep forgetting – which Disney princess is it who solves all her own problems without trying to find a boyfriend?
• I’m assuming Greek yogurt is just regular yogurt but with way more hair.
• Whoever determined that a 1-inch candy bar should be called “fun sized” should really re-evaluate their standards for entertainment.
• FUN THING TO WRITE ON A POST CARD: “Weather is great, having tons of fun! Are you still planning to murder your mailman?”
• Hey, girls who won’t stop talking about how much you love sports: We get it. You want a boyfriend.
• I’m surprised more people don’t Photoshop a cleaner house into the background of their pictures.
• I am constantly putting things where they don’t belong, like the cereal in the fridge or my keys in the laundry or my faith in other people.
• Whenever I open my fridge, my dog looks at me with a puzzled look and he thinks: Why don’t you eat all the food?
• I think its nice my vacuum cleaner has head lights….just in case I wanna wake up in the middle of the night and clean in the dark, or wake up my dog making him think he’s getting hit by a train.
• Hey scientists, you gave us Viagra, Cialis, and Levitra. How about you stop playing with your dicks and give us something for cancer?
• It’s been five minutes since Adobe asked me to install an update. I hope they didn’t go out of business or something.
• Millions of men have fought and died just so you have the right to…go on a website and whine about your ever so slightly imperfect life
• I saved a TON of money today by not being a shortsighted, materialistic idiot.

Tags:  Top 50-Awesome-Responsive-Facebook Status Updates,awesome facebook stauts updates,awesome whatsapp status,awesome twitter tweet messages,fb awesome status,awesome messages,funny status,short sms,one line  awesome text,status for facebook,fb,whatsapp,share on fb,facebook,whatsapp funny messages,status,upadates post on friends,wall,timelinem,jokes.

View the original article here

Best Friends Facebook Status Quotes Updates With Images

>

•  Nice friendship is Like The breathing air? You Will Never See it? But You Will Always Feel its Presence.


• ?If You feel hollow, let Me be the one, who fills You up with Love. Let Me free the butterflies within. Just open Your heart, and let Me in.?


• "What is a friend? A single soul in two bodies."


• Best friends are there for you even if you refuse to talk to them. Because they know, deep down, the silence is killing you.


• [Name] says there are some people in life that, no matter how much they hurt you, will never leave your heart or mind.


• To be a best friend doesn?t take much , a shoulder , an ear , some understanding, and not even have to say a word to make you laugh/smile.


• A good friend is hard to find, hard to lose, and impossible to forget.


• You can always tell who your true friends are. They?re the ones who will be there without you asking them to be. All the others are part-time friends.


• I love my best friend like a sister. There is never gonna be another like their in this whole wide world. No matter how hard i look i will never find another.


• Tell me who's your friend and I'll tell you who you are.


• Friends are like balloons, if you let them go you will never get them back again so tie them close to your heart so they won?t float away!


• The best way to stay close to someone is by being just friend. Nothing More and Nothing Less.


• Best friends are like shoes. Too many to choose from, but there?s always that one pair you like the most. (:


• I love my best friends they are the best and always will be! No matter if we are side by side or miles apart friends are forever close to our heart!


• Good friends will share the umbrella. Best friends Will steal it and yell: RUN LOSER RUN!


• Your real friends aren?t the ones you spend the most time with, but the ones you share the most memories with.


• A friend will let you sleep on the floor so you can have your own bed, but a BEST friend jumps on your bed, pushes you off and yells, ? Goodnight!? :D


• A simple friend thinks the friendship over when you have an argument. A real friend knows that it?s not a friendship until after you?ve had a fight.


• A good friend asks what you?re thinking. A best friend is already telling you it?s a bad idea.


• Good friends get mad if you wake them up when you call, a best friend asks what took you so long to call.

•  One million memories, ten thousand inside jokes, one hundred shared secrets, one reason: Best Friends.


• Friends are forever, until one of them gets a boyfriend.


• Friends are like your backbone. They are always there when you need support.


• Best Friend like a stars in the night sky.. Not always appear, but always there for us :D


• ?The making of friends, who are real friends, is the best token we have of a man?s success in life.?


• Best Friends are made are made through smiles and tears, and sometimes that fades away through miles and years.


• Lovers are fantastic. Best friends are awesome, but when both are the same person, there are no words to explain it


• A friend is someone who is there for you when he?d rather be anywhere else.


• Solving a problem in a friendship is hard. But letting that friend go is even harder. But sometimes its the right thing to do.


• Sometimes life gets harder and you break down and you need a friend to pick you back up. :)


• Friends are like shoes, some loose some tight, some fit just right, they help you as you walk through life ?Thanks for being my size.?


• A best friend is a friend you can call in the middle of the night and say that you killed someone and they?d ask where to hide the body (:


• A friend is someone who accepts your past, supports your present and encourages your future.


• A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.


• Love Him, and keep Him for thy Friend, who, when all go away, will not forsake thee, nor suffer thee to perish at the last.


• Friendship is not a big fire which burns all day. Its a small lamp that burns till the last day of life.


• Good friends are like diamonds very hard to find, but once you do they are way to precious to lose :-)


• The best antiques are old friends.


• The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend.


• ?I Can?t Promise To solve all your problems But I Promise that I will NEVER Let You Face those problems Alone ?Celebrating our FRIENDSHIP on all DAYS!!

•  ?Its lovely feeling when two strangers became friends..but it feels like hell when two friends became strangers? Hope that never happen between us? :-) friends forever :-)


• He is not my boyfriend!!!!!! But i love his smile, his kindness, his advice, his humor and the times we laugh together? and I guess i fell in love with our Friendship !!!!!! :-)


• Lovely FIFA mania : Most promising lines You can tell Your best friend- Until INDIA wins the football world Cup, I?m gonna keep friendship with You.


• Friendship is a strong and habitual inclination in two persons to promote the good and happiness of one another.


• Real friends don?t have to speak to or see each other daily to remain in each other hearts always:)


• True friends are like diamonds pure and rare. Fake friends are like leaves found everywhere.


• Without humor, life is boring. Without love, life is hopeless. Without friends like you, life is impossible!


• Friendship is like a book. It takes a few seconds to burn, but it takes years to write.


• Without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods.?


• A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.

•  Best friends do not judge each other.


• Dear Bestfriend, please stay in my life forever because you're one of the best things to ever happen to me. Love, me.


• A friend is someone who is there for you when he?d rather be anywhere else.


• A good friend is hard to find, hard to lose, and impossible to forget.


• Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship?NEVER


• A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.


• What is a friend? It is a person with whom you dare to be yourself.


• Friends in your life are like the pillars on your front porch. Sometimes they hold you up and sometimes they lean on you. Sometimes it?s just enough to know they are standing by.


• The recipe of friendship: 1 cup of sharing. 2 cups of caring. 3 cups of forgiveness & hugs. Mix all of these together to make friends 4ever.


• Don?t make friends before understanding & Don?t break friendship after Misunderstanding!

•  Thank you so much for being a part of my life. Without you, life wouldn?t be so wonderful.


• As a great friend once said, if someone is truly worth having in your life, you will go through anything to keep them there.


• Hanging with friends and laughing til you cry priceless..


• There?s a difference between Friends & best friends. if Ur upset a friend comes and hugs you.A best friend comes with a gun and says, alright who am i shooting?


• Sometimes friends can let you down, but once in a while they are the only reason that you are standing up.


• No relationship is perfect. You just have to know in your heart of hearts that the person you are with is truly worth fighting for no matter what.


• The best relationships start from friendships.


• I need less friends more bread, less talk more head.


• True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.


• A friend is a person who goes around saying nice things about you behind your back.

•  A best friend can tell you things you don?t want to tell yourself.


• A best friend is someone you can call at any hour to laugh, to cry, or to complain.


• You are a part of so many of my happiness, and I want you to know how special you will always be to me. Friends Forever...


• There is nothing better than a good and sincere friend. And there is no one better friend than you. May you live long. Happy friendship day.


• The circle of our friendship be always filled with love, care and sincerity. May my friends live long.


• There is someone who thinks about you right now and always remember you in his prayers. That?s the wonderful thing in true friendship.


• True Friends are same as Mirror you can see yourself by just seeing them, they reflect what you really are.


• I am lucky to get a friend like you. Your friendship is a most precious gift from Allah that will never get an end.


• A friend is same like you loving and caring and always be with you in any difficulty.


• Friendship is saying and listening. But the best friendship is thinking and understanding, you are my best friend.


• There's no better mirror than a bestfriend!

• True friends listen with their heart, not just their ears.


• "A true friend is someone who never gets tired of listening to your own pointless dramas over and over again."


• Best friends are like diamonds, precious and rare. False friends are like leaves, found everywhere.


• Real friends tell you the ugly truth, not pretty lies.


• Any person, anyone who never gives up on you, is a person you can call a real friend.


• A good friend will let you cry on your shoulder But! a Bestfriend will go kill the person who hurt you.


• Friends are angels who help us to soar when our wings have forgotten how to fly.


• A good friend will be there for you when you cry, But a best friend will have a wet shoulder because of it.


• A friend will bail you out of jail a best friend will be sitting next to you saying "that was great".


• True friendship is like sound health, the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.

• A true friend thinks youre a good egg even though youre slightly cracked.


• In life we never lose friend, we only find out who our real ones are.


• Friendship is based on trust, without it ; there is nothing.


• If Friends are like flowers.. That would explain my pretty bouquet!


• Anybody can listen to your problems. A friend will give you advice to try to make you feel better. A best friend will tell you the truth-good, bad, or ugly.


• To love is to have someone special one who you can always depend to be there through the years sharing laughter and tears as a partner, a lover, a friend.


• In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing. Make people smile and laugh and have a good time.


• ?Good friends are one of life's blessings.?


• It's cute when couples act like bestfriends or when bestfriends act like couples.


• ?Sometimes I guess it just feels better to know that you have someone to help you when you can?t even help yourself. ~ Willow Mosby (Exposing ELE)? ?

• Don?t walk in front of me, I may not follow; don?t walk behind me, I may not lead; walk beside me, and just be my friend.


• Never fall in love with your best friend because there is no being friends when it doesn?t work out.


• True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.


• It took days and days for us to become this close and weeks to build the trust but it only took you a second to ruin our friendship.


• You?re a perfect example of why friendships don?t last forever.


• I?m sending you a smile not because you made my day but because I?m hoping it will make yours a little bit better.


• Sometimes people build walls not to block others out of their life but to see who cares enough to break through the wall.


• True Friends look at you with no judgment in their eyes, they know you?ve made mistakes but they accept you for being human and help you right the wrongs.


• When you find yourself wondering if theyere worth it, if they were ever worth it. Remember all of the memories you have with them. It can save you, or break u


• It?s funny how some so called friends forget that you exist all of a sudden but think you will be there for them when they need you.

• A friend is one who believes in you when you have ceased to believe in yourself.


• Gems may be precious, but friends are priceless.


• Friendship is talking to your best friend without words.


• A friend is someone who reaches for your hand, but touches your heart.


• Friends are like poems, you may never fully understand them, but you will always love them.


• Friendship is like a golden chain, the links are the friends we hold so dear.


• True friends are the people who brighten your smile every time your with them.


• Friends are like money in the bank, longer you keep them, the more they are worth.


• Relationship Stages: Strangers ? Friends ? Close Friends ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Crush ? Relationship ? Heartbroken ? Strangers LIKE IF AGREE:)


• Some relations are Like Tom and Jerry. They tease Each Other, knock down Each Other, irritate Each Other but can?t live without Each Other!! Never Miss such friends?!!

Tags: Best Friends Facebook Status Quotes Updates With Images,Best Friends fb status,Best Friends facebook status,Best Friends whatsapp status,Best Friends facebook status messages,Best Friends fb status messages,Best Friends whatsapp status messages,Best Friends facebook,fb quotes,Best Friends whatsapp quotes,Best Friends quotes for her,Best Friends quotes for him,Best Friends sayings,Best Friends short sms text 140 character,Best Friends messages,Best Friends wishes messages,Best Friends facebook share messages status updates for friend,Best Friends fb share messages,Best Friends timeline share post,Best Friends funny status messages,post updates for Best Friends quotes,sayings,whatsapp,sms,Best Friends quotes with images for facebook,fb,whatsapp,Best Friends quotes with pictures for facebook,fb,whatsapp,Best Friends quotes wallpaper,desktop wallpaper,mobile,ipad,iphone,blackberry,android Best Friends messages,quotes,sms,images,wallpapers,free down

Hindi Love Status Sms

type='html'>

tut jaate hai sapne kabhi Aaine ki tarah,

Bikhar jaati hai zindgi tash ke paton ki tarah,

Ajeeb dastur bana diya Rab ne apno ke darmiyan…

Aate hai pass mohobat se to kabhi chale jaate hai dur beganon ki tarah.

View the original article here